Friday, March 4, 2011

Taxi Cab Confessions

 Lovely rainy, cool day today.  It's really awesome, I love it.  It also gives me a good excuse not to take the bus (which I hate) and take a taxi (which I hate less).  Actually, I love taxis - I just don't like to spend money on them.

Inside my comfortable, plush, spacious and cool taxi cab today, I find myself in conversation with the driver.  He's making the usual taxi cab small talk.  "Are you excited for Carnaval?"  "Do you live in Jacarepagua"  (and now that enough evidence of my accent has been exposed) "You're not Brazilian, are you?"

Taxi Cab Driver and I start discussing how it's nice to have an international relationship to learn about different countries and cultures.  He tells me "ah yeah, eu namorei com um francesa.  Ela ja voltou para Franca e queria para mim mudar la com ela, mas 'tava complicado... porque eu sou casado... tenho filhos... entendeu?"

Um. Yes. I entendi. 

So, let me get this straight (and now reveal for the non-Portuguese speakers)... you are openly admitting to me that you used to have a French girlfriend while you were married who wanted you to move to France but you couldn't because it was complicated??

When did this turn into an episode of Taxi Cab Confessions?

The honesty isn't even what is shocking.  It's more about the fact that it seems like too many people are advocates for cheating here!  Remember Rachel's post on cheating?  70% of Brazilian men are cheating or have cheated?  I have a good friend here who rooms with some older Brazilian ladies who have lived here their whole lives.  In these ladies' opinions, cheating is a part of life.  You can't, and shouldn't, expect your partner to be faithful.

Pair with it a general culture of overt sexuality; private motels for hookers couples - No wait, I change it back; women who identify themselves as 'feminine' and think they have power by exploiting their sexuality; men who think they run the place and treat others like meat... and the cycle continues.  Clearly I'm generalizing but I'm also not.

My whole point is that this culture of accepting cheating is done by both parties.  Men cheat and women accept.  The only reason I'm not giving the statistic the other way around is that my guess is in a masochistic society, the woman is around to serve and stay faithful.  I guess if they're ok with it in their own love triangles, ok for them.

But that is not for me.  In fact, I strongly believe that once you've committed yourself to another person (and if you both have made an agreement that you will be faithful to each other) cheating is 100% unacceptable.  That includes suggestive texting, suggestive messages on FB or anything that involves hiding something from your partner out of fear of them finding out.

That Taxi Cab Driver did not get a tip.


  1. I think this will get better in Brazil now that women are working more and becoming more educated, and aren't as dependent on their husbands. But it doesn't help that every single novela has at least one person cheating, and they always show the wife as the villian, not the mistress or the guy. The Catholic culture of "don't divorce for anything" is also a factor, but I think that'll fall by the wayside with more female education, too. I'm optimistic.

  2. Seriously, cab drivers here must be lonely or lack an off button because I get this way too often! My last taxi driver informed me that he doesn't believe in public transportation and would have refused to drive me to Laranjeiras if I didn't have the boot on. I was like, shhhhhhh.

    As for the cheating, yeah, kind of rough one. I think that the females are going to start doing the same thing...

  3. Whoa. The confession booth in Catholic church is not enough for some people, eh? Hehehe.

    I just watched that Taxi Cab Confessions. I had never seen it before, it's intense. Is it real or scripted?

    Anyhoo, glad you're getting a break from the heat!

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