The Next Chapter

Nothing to report lately - except obvious baby stuff but I don't want to fill this blog up with that.  That's what my Facebook is for ;)  Oh, and my English classes, Skype sessions with Mom and every waking second with my husband. 

Clearly I have baby on the mind and it's kind of taking over everything. 

But, well, I also have other things on my mind... like Canada.  So it's official.  We're moving back to Canada.  I'd say permanently, but seeing as our lives will be forever divided between two countries, I can't say that for sure.  I can say for sure that two months from now our bags will be packed and we will be on our way to the airport to close one chapter of our lives and open another one. 

While I'm completely certain that this is what I want, and feel like we're currently in a good place emotionally/spiritually/mentally in Brazil to say goodbye, what I'm having the hardest time with is the actual finality of this adventure. 

The first bit 20/29 months of my Brazilian life were really really really difficult.  I was not very happy, not in a great place, going through a lot of personal challenges... but after we moved (for the FOURTH time in 2 years!) things took an incredible turn for the better.  I actually started to see Brazil more clearly as my haze of hatred lifted.  There are many things I can credit (like our new neighbourhood, finally having friends close by, less travel time, and more culture - and don't forget, I started seeing an amazing psychologist).  But things really did get better.  I am happy now. 

Now after getting through almost two years that felt like they would NEVER END, I can't believe we only have two months left!  It's this bittersweet feeling that I've been grappling with lately.  There are a lot of things that are not ideal about Brazil, but there are a lot of awesome things that I'm going to miss as well. 

Portuguese is one of them. 

Also, farmer's markets.

Beautiful scenery.

Easy get-away weekend destinations.  (and I only just started getting into these!)

Friends who 'get' the difficulties. 

Being 'the foreigner'.  

Teaching English privately.

And especially, being close to Ro's family, and my second family. 

Two months is not long before we say goodbye to these things for a little while.  I think, however, I've become addicted to change so I'm really anxious and excited about starting anew.... As hard as things have been, I'm leaving this country more aware, accepting, patient and adaptable than when I started.  It's been a journey I wouldn't change for anything! 

Dear Air Conditiong: Please Come Back. I Miss You.

It's hot.  Like, really hot.  My friends in the snowy north continuously remind/ask me if I would prefer -20 degrees and truthfully, I can't answer that question.  But I know for sure I wouldn't prefer 40+...... and this is what we're dealing with here.

And now we've moved into a new apartment (yay!).  So many great things about living on your own.  But I've quickly discovered one bad thing.  No air conditioning.  C'mon, let's face it!  We're straight broke and other things like food have taken priority over AC for now.... My only respite is the fact that I'm here alone in the apartment and yep.  That means it's No Clothes-Ville for this suffering Canadian...

We have reached the point where any slight whisper of material touching my skin is enough to make me drop to the floor in a series of dramatic (and only slightly exaggerated) fits complete with loud complaining and pathetic whining, which is then followed by outright angry shouting:

"THAT'S IT! I'm going to buy TWO air conditionings tomorrow and I'm putting them on the credit card"
"Oh really? And how will you take them home with you on the bus?"
"I'll hire a driver and put HIM on the credit card!"
"You don't even have a credit card."
"AHHH I HATE YOU! IT'S SO FREAKING HOT!!!!"

True story. (And only slightly exaggerated...)

I can't even pretend to be a real Brazilian.  My husband pointed out that he grew up without AC so for him, "it's not so bad."  Well, Sir.  You may sleep in the "not-so-bad" living room and enjoy your heat.  I'll be in the bedroom with the air conditioning turned to "icicle". 

So in case you were wondering, yes.  It is allllll hanging out right now and while all of this naked freedom is liberating, it's really getting old fast.  I would like some air conditioning please.  It's like Tasha pointed out.  I'm in a new home which really should be christened (I'm pretty sure it's a rule in the bible) and it's too hot for anything more than a toe-rub.
Actually, it's more common to hear "Don't touch me.  Stop touching me... your leg hair is touching me!" than to hear any invitations of hanky panky.  Did I just refer to sex as hanky panky?  Ok, this heat is making me delirious. 

Time for my second shower of the morning! 

You know it's hot in Brazil when:

1. You get up after a 30 minute air conditioned bus ride with a huge, sweaty wet spot on the back of your dress.  It definitely looks like your peed yourself.

2. The nasty, dirty AC dripping onto you from the offices above in Centro is suddenly cool and refreshing. 

3. You stop caring about looking classy and sexy in front of your husband and instead opt for the 'let it all hang out' look.  It really doesn't even matter at this point.  It's not like you're getting any anyway because.........

4. Hot and sweaty sex actually sounds like your idea of hell. 

5. You can barely walk outside and when you do, you can't even make it to your destination in one go.  You need to sit down and take rests.

6. A slight, almost non-existent, breeze is the most AMAZING thing you have EVER FELT IN YOUR LIFE.

7. All of the Brazilians around you are complaining "Nossa! Que calor!" which makes you feel better about not being the only one who can't handle the heat.  Literally and figuratively.

8. Showering twice a day used to seem completely neurotic and obsessive to you.  Now you take two showers before noon.

9. You sweat.  All. The. Time. In fact, you are never ever not sweating.  You are sweating right now!

10. You actually think that -30 degree Canadian winter would be better than this heat.  So really, you've gone crazy.

Stay cool out there peeps!!