Just trying to kill some time in the Public Library

So, on Tuesdays and Thursdays I come all the way down to Zona Sul to teach some students.  It's about an hour and a half to two hour bus ride.  In case that sounded bitter in any way, it's not.  I actually love having a reason to come down here... it's far enough that I can't come just for a Sunday stroll.
The only crappy thing about my Tuesday/Thursday combo is that I have a huge gap of time between 2 and 6pm where I literally (figuratively) have to kill time until my last class and basically I have to try not to spend money. 


My last class is actually in Centro and on the way there I always pass the Biblioteca Nacional.  It's a really beautiful building and and I always think 'what better way to spend some free time than preparing for a class in an awesome library.' (Maybe you can think of other better ways actually... but this is pretty good).  I just have never made it inside yet.


Today my last morning class canceled so I actually had between 1 and 6pm to kill (ack) so I decided to meander on into the library for the first time.


Can someone tell me why getting into the library is like trying to get into prison????  It's like they're trying to keep the books from escaping.  And not only that, but you're actually not even allowed to ACCESS any books unless you know exactly what you're looking for.  I Just want to look at the damn books!  Just want to peruuuuuse the shelves.  Is that really such a problem at the LIBRARY?  Well, apparently here, it is. 


Before I made it through the threshold though, I managed to figure out that I needed a key to enter the library.  This led me to a verrrrrry tiny locker where I was advised to leave my enormous backpack and bring in only paper and a pencil.  I grabbed a pen, thinking 'pen, pencil, what's the diff?'.  I was STOPPED though by the huge prison guard blocking the entrance who said "PENCILS ONLY."

Okaaaaaayyyy...

Then I scanned my visitor's badge and was asked to hand over my notebook for the other prison guard to skim through it for...??  Whatever test I was going through, I passed because I was allowed to enter into one room and one room only.  This room: 

A huge private school study hall circa 1950. 

And why are there no books??  Only drawers and drawers of index cards?!  Huh?  Who uses the index card system??

Anyway, regardless of the super tight entrance system and old school filing system (which is actually pretty cool) this library is beautiful.  The building itself makes me stop to look every time I pass by.  The huge marble double staircase in the entrance is nothing less than just grand.  Another time I will pay the R$2 and get the full tour.  But for now, I sit here and write this blog the old fashioned way - pencil and paper in hand....

When It Rains, It Stinks

It´s rainy today.  Actually, it´s been rainy for the past two days.  The worst thing about the rain is the stink in the city.  There is a distinct ´wet human´ smell that I can smell as it walks towards me, from 5 meters away.  The thing is, on a regular day the 'poor unfortunate souls' spread out on the street, but when it starts to rain, they naturally take shelter.  So then there are 5 super stinky people all standing together at the top of the metro, under the roof of the office building, or blocking the sidewalk, inside the elevator, and on the metro.  I have started to anticipate when the stink starts and am able to inhale deeply right at the moment of contact, hold it, hold it, hold it and slowly exhale for a good 5 meters past the smell. 

Yeah, so, it stinks is what I´m trying to say. 

The other thing about the rain, which is pretty consistent with most cities (but maybe a little more here) is how the city slows down to HALF the normal slow speed.  Why is there a completely stopped traffic jam at 10:30 in the morning on the way to Zona Sul?  Because there is the threat of rain!  I swear, these Carioca´s slow down because it´s a little windy out.  Add to it the fact that I'm already late (all the time), so this stresses me out just a lil.   Actually, the only ones who DON'T slow down (and coincidentally the only ones who probably should slow down during rain) are BUSES.  Actually, buses probably speed up in the rain, taking their already alarming speed up to near death experience/could drive off the road and flip the entire bus speed.

Did I mention I saw a bus yesterday that had driven off the road?  Yeah, it was definitely in the ditch.  I saw this from the window of the bus I was on which was THE SAME ROUTE!

Anyway, enjoy the rain!

More on making friends in Rio

 

So, making friends in Brazil.  You've heard the rumours.  Brazilians are so so nice and so so friendly.  It should be a cinch to make friends then, right?  Not wrong, but not totally right.  In my experience with trying to make friends with Brazilians, I've sort of come up feeling shortchanged.  The conversations can be alright, especially if they speak a little English.  It usually turns into an amusing attempt at conversation with both sides making multiple errors and ultimately bonding over the fact that you are both making a fool of yourself in the other's language.

On the other hand, when you do speak Portuguese, and the person you're speaking with is relatively open-minded, they are pretty good to try and make you feel comfortable, translating occasional words into English (albeit you already know those words, but it's the thought, right?)

I had been getting a little bit tired of this though.  Friendships are never really truly developed.  Deep, meaningful conversations are never truly had.  There are too many pauses, stumbles, stutters... (for now at least). 

And another challenge for me has been the whole 'I live on the other side of the planet' thing.  I live in a neighborhood on the far west end of Rio.  I mean far.  You think Barra da Tijuca is far?  I live past Barra.... It really is the same experience that any of you living in a small town (or Niteroi) have.  You are surrounded by Brazilians who have lived there their whole lives.  Their families live there (both sides if they're married).  Their friends live there.  Cliques are made and although I've been invited out by my lovely SIL to join in, it never really evolves beyond that.

So I decided as of late that I need to get me some friends the good old fashioned way.  Just totally interrupting whatever they're doing and pushing my way in!

I probably should point out that I can only do this when I hear people speaking English and I can only find English people in Zona Sul.  On the subway, looking at a map on the street, in a bar...There's nothing that brings people together more than going up to someone speaking English in a bar full of Brazilians with your best 'Night at the Roxbury' opening... "you? me? you? me? you? me?"

Works every time.

I went to the only 'Irish Pub' in Rio last night (Shenanigans) looking for some friends.  The second I heard them (there were only 3) walk by me I practically ran out to the balcony after them. (Another 'keep in mind', I had arrived at 6 for happy hour, it was now 9:30 and I was already 3 1/2 pints in - Oh yes, I was alone in a bar. Big deal, wanna fight about it?)

At least you know you always have a good opening line when approaching other foreigners.  Especially when your goal truly is to make friends and not to pick up. (This makes it substantially harder, I might add!)
But it's like winning a game when you are well received by your chosen victims and they respond well to your methods, which are rather unconventional.  I sound like a goddamn vampire/molester.  English teacher by day, Vampire Molester by night.  That is, a vampire who molests people, I don't molest vampires.... what are you, sick?? 

Anyway, my friendship attack went pretty well - we exchanged emails and talked about meeting up again sometime.  It can definitely be tricky to make friends with the opposite sex.  I try to keep things reeeeeally casual and name drop my husband a lot.  Not in an annoying 'Just so you know I have a HUSBAND' way but in a protective 'Back off! Get your own sandwich!" kind of way...

See this Canadian commercial to know what I'm referencing here...




ANYWAY!
Friends are working their way into my life.  I would love to make good friends with some Brazilians here but I just have to keep working on the Portuguese bit by bit.  If I were to make this blog into a 'tip' blog, my #1 tip for people moving to Brazil (or any foreign country for that matter) is:

1. BACK OFF! GET YOUR OWN SANDWICH!
and my #2 tip is
2. LEARN HOW TO SPEAK THE LANGUAGE!! YOU'RE A FOOL IF YOU DON'T!

o fim de semana sempre passa muito rapido!!

Sunday night already... I could go to sleep right now! This weekend was one of the most entertaining/event filled weekends I've had since moving to Brazil. Serio!
Let's start with Thursday. Ro took the bus out to Botofogo to meet me after work so we could have a few chopp's and then catch an Anima Mundi film. The festival is playing animation films from all over the world. The set we went to see included two films from Canada, two from Brazil, an American, a Japanese a... Danish? British? I'm not remembering very well anymore. Anyway! We saw a bunch of different short animations which were all very... interesting.

Actually the whole thing really made me question whether or not I really enjoyed the films themselves or just the concept of going to the festival. I did LOVE the idea of going there... being amongst the artsy society of Rio, the bohemians, the creatives. But the films themselves were a bit out there - even for me, and I'm pretty open minded to the weirdest shit.
Y'know when you look at a painting that everyone has titled 'a masterpiece'... it's like a huge black circle with red streaks of paint all across it with one, single, tiny yellow dot in the middle that is supposed to represent something? And you are thinking to yourself "I don't get it." That's kind of how I felt with some of these films. One was about a man who hated to waste anything, who suddenly discovers a tree growing out of his head. In the end people start going to this tree as it blooms and having fun, partying, drinking, and end up leaving tons of garbage on his head. He gets so angry that he rips the tree out of his head in a giant rage. Then he has a big hole in his head which turns into a lake and the same people come back to go swimming and littering some more.

So umm.... I don't get it. I mean I get it. I get the symbolism. I also get that sometimes you aren't meant to get it. It's the creator's art and it's for them to understand sometimes.

Anyway, I DID love drinking chopps on a Thursday with my husband in Botofogo and going to the film festival after. Sometimes the idea of it is all you need.

Friday we went to see the Christ for the first time since I've arrived in Rio! IT was a beautiful day for siteseeing and the Christ was really impressive. Yep, that's all I have to say about that. Instead, here are some pictures.

SATURDAY, as you may have heard, I met up with Jim, Rachel and Greg for chopps in Copacabana. Guys, thanks for such an awesome afternoon. What I thought was especially great though - in addition to speaking at a normal speed with common expressions - was that BECAUSE we all live in Rio and therefore speak the same Brazilian slang, the conversation was also littered with these everyday Portuguese expressions we now use here in Brazil that are only REALLY understood by another foreigner living in Brazil. From the two kisses hello to the 'ti, ti, ti', to the 'opa' to the brushing off hand movements, to the mais tres chopps, and then mais quatro chopps (when Greg arrived) and, of course, finishing off with a nice saidera. This is what's nice about hanging out with other foreigners. We can talk 'foreigner' and we can also talk 'native'. Rachel, I don't know how you went to another party afterward. I definitely fell asleep on the bus on the way home.

Ladies and Gents, please schedule into your day planners the event on August 20-22 or 27-29. www.carnavaldasculturas.org, Rio's annual multicultural event by the beach. I know it's far for some of you (very far for some) but it would be a GREAT weekend away and you know we will all make time for each other!

What a great weekend!

Is a Stereotype a Stereotype for a Reason?

Let us discuss, for a moment, the Brazilian Stereotype.

There are many a stereotype in the world.  Here are a few (as taken from this site:
Here we have the Canadian Stereotype:

Canadians – submissive; neurotic; agreeable; modest; open-minded; progressive; efficient; straight-forward; polite; respectful; anxious; law-abiding; orderly; caring for handicapped/elderly/minorities; tolerant; multi-lingual; moderate; no hero/celebrity worshiping; don’t like successful people; anti-American; passive; boring; socialist mindset; eat blubber; wear funny hats; live in igloos further north (they forgot drink a lot of Molson Canadian)

And here we have the American Stereotype:

American – arrogant; assertive; open-minded; materialistic; ambitious; progressive; efficient; straight-forward; alert; practical; US-centered world view; egoistic; anxious; fast food eaters; war mongers; God is with us!

British Stereotype: 

British (UK) – drinkers; lousy food; stiff upper-lips; ultra-traditional; steady-on, old chaps; bulldog spirit; bad teeth and hygiene; rude; thin; smoke cigar or pipe; scruffy hair; “fitted” clothing; heavy binge drinkers; swear all day long; artistic; “fashionable”; deep thinkers; intelligent and articulate; boastful; anti-American; ride bikes; God save the Queen!

And just because I see some people in France are reading my blog (Sacrebleu! lol), here we have the French Stereotype:

French – good lovers; best cuisine in the world; chaotic; irresponsible; introverted; selfish; cultured; social “players”; do not like to work – prefer to strike; always surrender in war; don’t speak English; rude to tourists; anti-American; ungrateful; live in a bureaucratic Socialist system, totally dependent on the state; don’t use soap; arrogant and conceited; distant and difficult to meet; don’t respect religious freedom; snobs; God who?

And now for the Brazilian Stereotype:

 Brazilians – body-centric; party animals; impulsive; incestuous; megalomaniac; most women are super-models, most men are gay or machos; always late; carnivals addicts; soccer and coffee lovers; criminals and robbers; lazy/manana attitude; bean and meat eaters; beach and sun-worshipers; bikini (called: dental floss here) inventors; active; inventive and constructive people; always trying to outwit government and regulations; impossibly favor-oriented; family- and community-oriented

The whole point of this post started because in the last two days (and of course on other days as well) I've heard some very negative stereotypes about Brazilians being spoken out loud.  By Brazilians.  It seems to me that Brazilians have a very negative stereotype of themselves and I really didn't understand where it came from.  In Canada, at least, the impression Canadians have of Brazil is beautiful women, small bikinis, beaches, carnival, soccer.  At least, that's all I really knew about before meeting a (real life!) Brazilian.  Of course, it's a true stereotype but maybe it just perpetuates the Canadian stereotype that we're all so nice and open-minded, that we really wouldn't have a negative opinion about anyone anyway (except Americans of course!)!

Anyway, the only things I ever hear Brazilians saying about themselves is that they are lazy, hate working, and steal everyone's shit.  Oh that, and they are all so friendly because they kiss hello (and North American's are cold because they don't).  Getting off topic!  Note to self: Don't turn this into a rant!

In the last two days I mean, I've heard 2 Brazilians talking about how Brazilians hate working and if they didn't have to work they wouldn't.  And they were telling this to their BOSS!  And the 3rd guy said that in Canada, the reason Canadian are able to carry our bikes on the front of busses (side story) is because no Brazilians live there!  They say in Brazil, you would never be able to do this because someone would steal your bike.

I just wanted to get to the bottom of whether or not certain stereotypes exist cross-culturally and if these stereotypes are generally true or not.
What do you guys think of this stereotype?  I personally have never even seen this type of behaviour in 'real' Brazilians.  At least, no more than you see it in any other culture.

Not in the same way I see Canadians in their funny hat wearing, law abiding, boring way.  Not the way I see Americans eating fast food and being big war supporters.  Not the way I see the English with their lack of a good dentist or stiff-upper-lips.  Not the way I see the French wearing berets and carrying a french stick in a basket on a bike.  (Wait they really do that and I LOVE it!)

The point is, stereotypes exist because 'apparently' the majority of the population is like that.  According to the website I acquired this info from though, it says that “National character stereotypes are not even exaggerations of real differences: They are fictions.”

I dunno though!  You tell me - what do you think of your own stereotype?  Is it true for a lot of people or totally off?

Friendly Shmendly!

Goddamn it!  I've been so emotional the past couple of days.  I finally hit my rock bottom as I sit here bawling my eyes out to the Biggest Loser!  I find that I go through these phases about once every month...  They always happen around every 28 days... it's just so strange!  I can't figure out what on Earth would cause me to feel a little sad every 28 days.  Not a clue.

Anyway, I'm tearing up now because the fatties on Biggest Loser just got to call home and, well, y'know, sad sad tears sad. 

Seriously though... this show is so sad sometimes :'(

I also cried while watching the Shakira video of Waka Waka Whatever (y'know, the World Cup song?)  So I'm pretty sure I'm not a very reliable source of what is genuinely sad and what is not.

I had kind of a flip out moment on Friday night as well.  I know it's a combo of my being sensitive but also of experiencing something that I have experienced more than a few times here in Brazil.  This thing is Brazilian Rudeness/Lack of Social Skills.

It started out as an awesome night.  Ro and I going on a date to Outback (where he works), drinkin' some beer, eating some junk food.  Always a good time.  What I maybe wasn't expecting was the constant line of people coming up to the table to talk to us.  It's cool.  There are some people there that I've met that I like.  They are friendly. They talk to me and include me in the conversation.  I try really hard to pay attention, understand and contribute.

But there were also some people who were not these things.  One girl came up just because she heard I was there and she wanted to look at me.  The only problem was I was not in the mood to be looked at.  In that way.  That way where I am foreign and different and she doesn't want to 'know' me, she wants to look at me.
Another friend came up and had several lengthy conversations with Ro while completely ignoring me.  In that way where you talk to one person directly and don't even glance in the other person's direction.
Another guy came up to us, said hi to Ro, shook his hand, said hi to the waiter friend serving us, patted him on the back, and didn't even look my way for a second before leaving!  Totally snubbed!

I just don't get this.  After the third time, even Ro's nice waiter friend commented on it. "Some people just don't have good social skills".  Ro said "I think it's a cultural thing."  Cultural thing?  Try really rude thing.  

I don't think it is a cultural thing because not everyone is like that here in Brazil.  But this specific situation has happened to me on more than one occasion and it makes me feel so invisible and unimportant.  Not to mention it's just f'ing RUDE.  It really just widens the gap I feel here with making friends with Brazilians.
*I have to repeat though that IT'S NOT LIKE THIS WITH EVERYONE.  In fact, I've met some really really awesome Brazilians who I think I can consider my friends.*

Maybe if this situation happened in another weeks time, I would be able to just brush it off but on Friday it just hit me like toothache.  Annoying, painful and... toothy??  Terrible simile.  Whatever! It hurt my feelings a lot.  I just felt like such an outsider.  Anyway.

Lookin forward to our bloggy date this weekend!  I want to see you all!!!  Even (especially) you guys who have to travel far distances.  Plleeeeeeeeeease come!

Laura is coming!!!

I am sooo excited!!  My friend Laura just let me know that she's booked a flight and is COMING to visit me in November!!!  Oh man, I can't even wait. 

Last night I hung out with a friend that I met randomly in Outback Steakhouse.  Funny story.  She heard me speaking English.  She made the first move.  I'm so glad she did because at the point I'd been here for only 2 months and wasn't feeling desperate enough brave enough to start approaching random English speakers.  (I'm there now so I am so so so so grateful that she spoke to me!!  I totally get it!) 

It was a great evening of English speaking, eating, drinking and good company.  I miss speaking English so badly.  What I really miss though, is something I haven't even had until now.  I miss speaking English with another foreigner who understands what I'm going through.  Is it any wonder that I rely on our blog network to share/discuss information about the goods, the bads and the uglies?  I don't have any other social network that lets me vent and observe in the same way.  That, of course, is part of the sacrifice of living in the suburbs of the city.

I've started to realize that if I really want some friends I've got to just go for it.  Just be honest.  I'm starting to just say it.  I'm telling my students.  Guys, I got no friends and ps. don't speak English like that.  I'll travel distances. 

Do you guys want to come to Rio for a weekend in August?  There is a big multicultural event happening over 2 weekends and I figure, what better time than that to come together.  The dates are 20-22 and 27-29 of August.  I'll get more details and post!